Dreamgirl here! - Lakita's pursuit of "the bikini"

I feel like I just got recruited or something and it’s time to go to camp with the team. I’m really excited to work with my ‘teammates’ and our coaches in reaching our common goal, or at least mine – Dreamgirls! Beyoncé look out! Now I really have to perform because “mama-an-nem” will be logging on to see my progress so I must become a woman on a mission. I hope I will be able to work as a team player but it’s kind of hard right now with a newborn in a city where you have no friends or family as backup support when I need a mommy break to go work out. I simply refuse to leave my baby with someone I don’t know. To further complicate matters I’ve recently had some health issues that were pregnancy induced and have ended up in the emergency room 3 times since the baby was born. I thought I was having a heart attack until they correctly diagnosed me with gall stones. I haven’t even started the program yet and I am thoroughly exhausted! Hopefully I can find support among the other 5 women in my group but I’ve already missed out on a pre-Christmas dinner they had because of lack of childcare and a crisis that took place that night. A good friend, whose wedding I was in, was doing a routine roadside check with his partner when he was shot five times by an assailant who is still at large. I helped as best as I could but it’s in God’s hand now. I know just how important it is to have friends who support you in your time of need.

 
Making a personal commitment to this project is complicated on many levels. For one, I am generally a self-motivated person who doesn’t need a pat on the back, a word of encouragement, or a happy face – although a cookie would suffice. However, since this is a weight loss program, cookies are probably not in the equation. But it seems these days that I have no energy. My get up and go, has got up and went, so it seems that I am left to depend on the encouragement of others. Committing to the group, however, is another issue that has pluses and minuses. Often we will do for others what we won’t do for ourselves because when we are in need, we are more willing to handle disappointment in our own failures than those of others. Eighteen months ago as a single woman, I wouldn’t have given a second thought about making a commitment and fulfilling it. But now after marriage and a baby there are others who must be considered before committing and greater disappointment if those obligations are not fulfilled. Overall, I think that the relationships with these women will be a good thing considering I have only a few in my new city with whom I am acquainted, and I hope to learn a lot about them, and from them. I’m sure there will be many personal revelations shared amongst us. Truly the whole point of vulnerability is allowing people to see the real you, but the words “Internet” and “intimate” are usually an oxymoron and shouldn’t be used in the same sentence. However, I believe in this case things might be a little different because I know that people often share their deepest thoughts and feelings via the web but that’s only because people can’t see them. There is little anonymity here, I’m not a shy person, and therefore, this is going to be interesting.

 
There are a whole lot of women out there just like me who have made new year’s resolutions in the past to battle the bulge and did it alone. So I’m sucking it up, kicking it in, and letting it all hang out! Truly, I have no other choice because my girdle doesn’t fit anymore. Day one of the yoplaitbikini.com diet program was the last time my scale will groan, “get off of me!” Hopefully soon I won’t be “thick around the waist and taking up space!”